*SLOWLY but SURELY*

I or rather "we" are taking things very slowly . . . maybe trying to have a fresh start I guess? We're exclusively dating, and trying to fix things in the past..

Right now, I really don't know..

I am still torn on 2 decisions whether i'll pursue it or not.

hmmm...

Hano kaya??

Bahala na...

-pots

**Sa Guijo Nights**

more pictures click here!

Patty, Marco, Dan and I went to watch my bro's band's (the wuds) gig in Sa Guijo bar at Makati. It was a very looonngg day for us. Patty and I cherished our moments with our "exes", Marco and Dan. Well, we're trying to be friends with them after the bawawaw break-ups. We just thought that maybe we could cling with each other as friends. We enjoy the night, really.

After the gig, we went to Dan's work, in Gloria jeans, had our cup of coffee and endless conversation. Then at 4 o'clock in the morning we decided to eat in Sinangag express in BF Homes. Gaadd, I had a fever actually, and that time really, I can feel the heat all over my body and slowly I feel weak. I lost my appetite, my taste buds felt sour. But what i was thinking that time; "Sara you're with Dan, so you're fine, no matter what!!" . . . So even I felt weak that time, I still did my most effort to enjoy the day with my ex-boyfriend. Gaaadd! I miss him so.. hargs!

Then, we stayed at Patty's house, we slept there, until lunch time, and that afternoon was very memorable to us, really, total bonding ever!!!! basta, iba trip naming apat nun, asteg.

nakauwi ako mga 5pm.. and grabe, umuwi akong zombie!! as in zombie!!!!! hahaha! Lahat ng trip naramdaman ko.. gaaddd!!! hahaha!

Anyway.. the saddest part..

Yeah, it was fun, but when I was in my room, tears slowly fell down from my chic. for I am back again in reality that he's not mine and will never be. It was like a one day wish, and my wish expired after. So much for love, so much for everything. . . Gaadd, hanggang kelan magiging ganto? Puro hiram na lang lahat.... haays

**I smell something fishy!!**

** please Lord! I don't want finding myself saying, "history repeats itself", Please NO! I don't deserve it, in the very first place. I already experienced it, I don't want to happen again... and I don't want to feel that kind of situation again,... #no apple and christian thingy please!!# People knew, how tragic it was.. And I don't want to be in that situation again for the second time.. Because, this time it's different, I think I'll die if that happens. Please no,... if people have conscience enough, they will never do it...

*** My paranoia is killing me.. maybe I am just too cautious of what will happen, and that's my biggest fear... I don't want to feel betrayed again... please.. = ( it's too much if you'll let it.. I hope my instinct fail!

-pots

"Grey Clouds on my Head"

I don't know. . . I miss him but I know I have to stop longing for him, I care for him but I feel it is useless of showing it, I want to hug him, but my arms can't move to hug him back, I want to kiss him, but I am so scared to get hurt afterwards, I love him, but i know I have to move on. . . I have to say goodbye and face my new life without him . . . I am now confused, will I pursue it or not?

I know I have to decide and make things happen as soon as possible, this is difficult, but I have to sacrifice. . . i don't know what will happen next, all I want is to end it, to make things better for the both of us.

I feel sorry, but I guess, this is it . .

3...3...3...3..3 can we just skip October 3???

I just remember: It’s our 11^th Monthsarry . . And it feels sad because he’s not mine anymore . . Kala ko magtatagal kami . .

*lungkot mode*

Haays.. so much for this, gotta go!! Ciao!

Meeting "Poging" Pat-pat ~hehe~

Pat and I went to Greenbelt last night. The moment I saw her, I was surprised "Woah!! Patty!!!! You're so damn Pogi!!" hahaha!! She looks a little bit, sassy, a pinch of maturity and a bunch of bi-sexualism!!" joke lang!! She matured a lot! She's stunning mind you! Sayang, pinakawalan ni Marco!! haha And definitely she doesn't want long hair anymore. . Good thing she looks a lot better after the break-up. Yeah! I believe that people became prettier after a bawawaw break-up. And I'm happy for her.

We had a hell fun night! Talking about silly stuff that will surely make you laugh!! minsan maiiling ka na lang =D hehe "haay boys are dogs" hahhaha!! By the way, the food in crocodile grill is so damn delicious! Try it, it's affordable.. 120php and above. =)

"poging pat-pat and fabulous curly pots"

"Tripping inside the dirty comfort room"

"Definitely I had Fun!!! Pun pun pun!!!"

3+1=4 "A Painful Sacrifice"

I think, 4 people who says "I should do it" is quite enough to pursue some concerns that would eventually put into an end. Yeah, it took me almost 3weeks to decide. I asked different perspective, from a serious guy and girl and a chicboy and happy go lucky girl. And almost everybody said that I should DO IT!

Haays... I think they're right, and this would be the very painful sacrifice that I will make. . . I know I should speak my mind for once, and make my own stand. .

As for now, I will not tell any details yet. . I will just keep it to myself first. I'll post it when that "moment" comes.

As for now, I will let my tears flow, and eventually I'll let it dry when that time comes. . Iniisip ko pa lang, parang mamamatay na ako... Ang sakit = ( PERO KAILANGAN

-Sara

My Barok moments ~feeling sick, I can't think of anything = (~

**First** I dreamt last last night that I have breast cancer! (hala) I think it was a warning for me to stop from smoking. But despite of my dreams, I just can't prevent myself from smoking! ~addicted~

Last night, I went to my sister's house because of some important matters. And since it was so late when I arrived (11:00pm), I decided to sleep there instead.

*mike (my sister's friend/neighborhood) and I had a small chit-chat before I go to sleep. It was a fun conversation, and he helped me realized some stuff regarding my current situation. Actually Mike is my confidante, I may say I can share with him every details that is happening in my roller coaster kind of life. =)

Morning of October 02, 2007:
I woke-up early so I might finish some errands early. I went to the coffee shop, Gloria Jeans Coffee (to where my sister is working as a supervisor) to have my breakfast. Then I went to Metrobank Alabang, to pay my bills for the laptop. It was a very loooooooooooooong lane, and the bank assistant teller were ssooooooo slooooowwww... haayyy! sayang oras!

after the bank thingy:

**the rain pours so hard!!**
waahhh!!! I was stranded by the traffic.. huhuhu kung kelan naman na I need to go to work. haayys ang tagal, at mano-mano pa ang pagsakay ko to get in Makati, ~gutom~

Then finally, I arrived at my office! Buti hndi nagalit si Ms. Russ! (wew!) to make bawi, I efficiently finished the SME Toolkit Road Show report in Cebu, and its Photos and captions. So, so far so so good! I like it! I appreciate yung tulungan namin ni Ms. Russ.

*I'm blessed*

Marami din ako ginawa this day, mailing list updates, encoding, ung SME Special Report nga, Yung Forum and research for Los Baños. Tapos ko na din yung Las Piñas Road Show the salt bed city. (actually nauna ko pa isulat yun kaysa sa Laguna, nakalimutan ko si Laguna eh)

**AND now... feeling ko i'll get a fever! Iba pakiramdam ko.. medyo dizzy and nanlalambot :-S haays.. wag naman sana, "bawal mag-kasakit"

And feeling ko puro wrong grammar na ako dito!! hahahaha! kaya nga nagtagalog na eh! Kasi hindi na ako makaisip, nahihilo ako.. huhu

**Later** Pat-pat and I will meet later!! Yihee!!! chika ever about exes.. haayyss.. that's our common denominator.. the exes.. And I am glad we're friends, at least nagtutulungan kami in dealing our exes. (FYI:our exes are bestfriends) haha

oki, gotta go!! ciao!! =*, to my readers, I admit my writings tonight is so so so lame.. and i know my mga mali... sorry.. edit ko na lang ito next time! mwah!!!